We live by an imaginary order.

ByVinity Gill September 2, 2023September 30, 2024

Relationships are built on an imaginary order. This order dates back to 4.8 billion years. It was a time when Earth was just born, and single-cell organisms needed to survive. Our body also has a single-cell organism that lives within an imaginary order.

What is this order? This order is something that keeps the cohesiveness, the balance and homeostasis. It is the relationship between each cell that keeps our body functioning. Any dysfunction can lead to symptoms.

Physical symptoms such as cancer, arthritis, and diabetes. Mental symptoms like schizophrenia, anxiety, depression, etc. Social symptoms like substance abuse, gambling etc.

Similarly, human relationships are built on the imaginary order. The order that finds it difficult to balance and causes enough anguish to see self as a victim to it. It is an order of we and them, it is an order of blame and change, it is an order of right and wrong, it is an order of expectation, attention, approval, and distress.

There is no single fingerprint when it relates to EMOTIONS.

ByVinity Gill October 1, 2023September 30, 2024

I got a call from my father. He says, “Mother is in depression.”I ask him what gives him this indication. He says, “She is not talking and does not open her eyes.” About the mother, she has fibrosis in her lungs, and her condition has deteriorated in the last couple of months. She has lived…

The immaturity cycle: Expectations, rejections and more expectations.

ByVinity Gill November 21, 2023September 30, 2024

Humans possess a thinking brain, but it is relatively new in its usage. On the other hand, the emotional brain has been in practice for billions of years, even before Homoerectus appeared on Earth about 2 million years ago. The purpose of this blog is to urge you to think, feel, and observe yourself just…

Towards a science of Subjectivity?

ByVinity Gill January 8, 2024September 30, 2024

A question that Dr Murray Bowen posited to Neuroscientist Paul MacLean. https://jamanetwork.com/journals/archneurpsyc/article-abstract/651926. Human behaviour is as intriguing as the cells in our body. What we say and do are two entirely different things; similarly, the cells react to the intrusion of the virus and bacteria or the shift in the internal/external environment. The human brain…

An insight of a daughter. The Willingness to become my being.

ByVinity Gill October 22, 2023September 30, 2024

The theory of Dr. Murray Bowen’s family system informs my perspective on the importance of natural science and familial relationships. It has helped me understand that the connections between individuals in a family are similar to those in natural environments, such as trees, reptiles, bees, ants, and mammals. For instance, the trees communicate and keep…

I am not in a mood. I woke up feeling sensitive.

ByVinity Gill December 2, 2023September 30, 2024

In my clinical practice, I have heard these statements many times. However, the individual seems unaware of how they wake up and feel sensitive. When I hear the unawareness, I think, how can we be so disconnected? How come we lose our ability to know who we are, and how do we lose touch with…

The Acceptance, The learning And The Steadiness.

ByVinity Gill November 13, 2023September 30, 2024

Mother’s death has left a gaping hole and has made me sensitive to others whom I called my own. The sensitivity is “expectations.” The reaction towards them is “distance”, almost leading to “cut-off”. The burden I carry is “feeling cheated and alone”. The emotions are “victimhood”. The first question I ask is, “How helpful is…

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